Zap Update

THE OFFICE OF POOFNESS….8/7/14
HI ALL

A GROUP OF YAKS GATHERED QUIETLY DOWN BY THE STREAM. THEY WORE THEIR BEST HOLIDAY HAIR, AND THEIR HORNS WERE SHINY. THEY WERE CONFUSED. THEY HAD NO MAP TO GET TO CHINA. A FRIENDLY CRITTER KNOWN TO THEM AS THE OBAAAMAN WAS WALKING BY, AND INVITED THEM ALONG AS HE WAS GOING THERE TO SIGN THE DEAL WITH THE CHINESE MAN AND SAVE HIS COUNTRY.

THEY FOLLOWED FOR A WHILE UNTIL THEY GOT TO THE BORDER. AT THE BORDER, THE YAKS WENT IN AND TOOK THE NEXT ROAD TO THE DESTINATION RESORT THEY WERE PROMISED. THE FRIENDLY CRITTER WAS TURNED AWAY, AND THEY HEARD ONE OF THE CUSTOMS GUARDS A MUMBLING THAT THEY DO NOT ALLOW FAKE THIEVES INTO THE COUNTRY. THE YAKS LUMBERED HAPPILY ALONG.

GOD WAS WATCHING.

BUT THE OLD MAN IN CHINA CONVINCED THE CUSTOMS TO LET HIM IN DESPITE HIS HISTORY. ESCORTED BY MANY PURPLE PIGS AROUND THEM, THEY WENT TO A NOODLE HOUSE. THE OLD MAN WAS GOING TO GIVE THE FRIENDLY CRITTER A WHOLE BUNCH OF EGGS TO GO AND FEED HIS PEOPLE AND SAVE HIS COUNTRY. THE CRITTER WANTED THE CHICKENS TOO THAT LAID THE EGGS.

THE OLD MAN TOLD HIM THAT SINCE HE WAS BLACK ALREADY, HE WOULD JUST BE LISTED. THE CRITTER JUMPED UP AND DOWN SCREAMING IN RAGE AND FINALLY SETTLED DOWN, APOLOGIZED, AND TOOK THE EGGS. HE WENT BACK HOME.

AT HOME, HE WAS TAKEN TO HIS SPECIAL HOME, ALL WHITE AND GLISTENING WITH A LITTLE COCKTAIL UMBRELLA ON ONE SIDE, AND MET WITH SOME OTHER PEOPLE THAT TOOK THE EGGS FOR DISTRIBUTION TO THE PEOPLE. THEY SIGNED A WHOLE BUNCH OF PAPERS THAT SAID THAT FROM NOW ON, THEY WOULD DO THE DISTRIBUTING OF EGGS. THE PEOPLE REJOICED. A NEW WORLD WAS BORN FILLED WITH EGGS.

SO, THE PIGS AGAIN STARTED FLYING AND DROPPING EGGS INTO THE HOMES OF THE PEOPLE. HAPPY PEOPLE. HAPPIER PIGS. THEIR JOBS WERE ALMOST DONE. THEY TOO COULD GO TO A DESTINATION RESORT AND RELAX AND BASK IN WARM MUD.

THE TRN IS HERE.

AND PROSPERITY SHALL FLOW.

AND GOD IS STILL WATCHING, AND THE OLD MAN IS SMILING.

CAN I GET ROYALTIES ON THIS BOOK? THE DIAL A DINAR IS SPUTTERING DOWN, AND I CAN’T GETS NO MORZ MONEES.

ENJOY WHAT COMES NEXT. THURSDAY MAYBE. GLOBAL ANNOUNCEMENT? PUBLIC INSTEAD OF JUST COMMERCIAL? THE SHADOW IS SCRATCHING HIS HEAD.

IN LOVE AND LIGHT IN OUR SERVICE
ZAP

“GOD IS; I AM; WE ARE”
“BE GOOD, BE LEGAL, TELL TRUTH”

 

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